Genesis 38:6-26 - Judah got a wife for Er, his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. But Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the Lord’s sight; so the Lord put him to death.
Then Judah said to Onan, “Sleep with your brother’s
wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to raise up offspring for
your brother.” But Onan knew that the
child would not be his; so whenever he slept with his brother’s wife, he
spilled his semen on the ground to keep from providing offspring for his brother.
What he did was wicked in the Lord’s sight; so the Lord put him to death also.
Judah then said to his daughter-in-law Tamar, “Live as
a widow in your father’s household until my son Shelah grows up.” For he
thought, “He may die too, just like his brothers.” So Tamar went to live in her
father’s household.
After a long time Judah’s wife, the daughter of Shua,
died. When Judah had recovered from his grief, he went up to Timnah, to the men
who were shearing his sheep, and his friend Hirah the Adullamite went with him.
When Tamar was told, “Your father-in-law is on his way
to Timnah to shear his sheep,” she took off her widow’s clothes, covered
herself with a veil to disguise herself, and then sat down at the entrance to
Enaim, which is on the road to Timnah. For she saw that, though Shelah had now
grown up, she had not been given to him as his wife.
When Judah saw her, he thought she was a prostitute,
for she had covered her face. Not realizing that she was his daughter-in-law,
he went over to her by the roadside and said, “Come now, let me sleep with
you.”
“And what will you give me to sleep with you?” she
asked.
“I’ll send you a young goat from my flock,” he said.
“Will you give me something as a pledge until you send
it?” she asked.
He said, “What pledge should I give you?”
“Your seal and its cord, and the staff in your hand,”
she answered. So he gave them to her and slept with her, and she became
pregnant by him. After she left, she took off her veil and put on her widow’s
clothes again.
Meanwhile Judah sent the young goat by his friend the
Adullamite in order to get his pledge back from the woman, but he did not find
her. He asked the men who lived there, “Where is the shrine prostitute who was
beside the road at Enaim?”
“There hasn’t been any shrine prostitute here,” they
said.
So he went back to Judah and said, “I didn’t find her.
Besides, the men who lived there said, ‘There hasn’t been any shrine prostitute
here.’”
Then Judah said, “Let her keep what she has, or we
will become a laughingstock. After all, I did send her this young goat, but you
didn’t find her.”
About three months later Judah was told, “Your
daughter-in-law Tamar is guilty of prostitution, and as a result she is now
pregnant.”
Judah said, “Bring her out and have her burned to
death!”
As she was being brought out, she sent a message to
her father-in-law. “I am pregnant by the man who owns these,” she said. And she
added, “See if you recognize whose seal and cord and staff these are.”
Judah recognized them and said, “She is more righteous
than I, since I wouldn’t give her to my son Shelah.” And he did not sleep with
her again.
We circle back to an odd and sordid story found in the
middle of the Joseph story about Tamar. Just the fact that her story is
included in the Bible is significant.
She is a woman in an extremely patriarchal time period and thus would
normally be regarded as irrelevant. More than that, she is a gentile which is a
second strike against her being included in the sacred story of God’s chosen
people. Furthermore, did I mention that this story is a sorted kind of tale? So
why is Tamar’s story told?
Tamar is Judah’s daughter-in-law. Her husband dies, so
according to custom, the brother of the deceased is obliged to marry her and
conceive a child to continue the deceased family line. The second brother dies
as well. Judah is spooked. He begins to believe the Tamar is somehow cursed and
he fears for the life of his third son, who is now obliged to marry her. Judah
decides to break this promise/obligation and withhold his third son.
Tamar devises a plan to fulfill her own sense of
purpose to provide an heir for her first husband. She tricks Judah into
sleeping with her by disguising herself as a prostitute. As “collateral” for
her services until Judah can bring her a goat as payment, Tamar asks for
Judah’s seal, cord, and staff. She is not interested in getting paid; she is
not a prostitute. She is interested in proving to others with whom she
conceived her child.
When Judah finds out Tamar is pregnant, he is about to
have her killed when she produces the proof of the Father. Judah realizes he
has been outsmarted by the woman with whom he intended to break a promise. She
“forced” him to keep his promise. What a messy story!
This is the kind of family story that one would not be
told at family gatherings. At best, it might be whispered about in the corner.
So why in the world would it be included in sacred writings, published for the
world to see. And why on earth would Tamar be mentioned in the genealogy of
Jesus in Matthew 1?
I believe this story is told as a reminder of at least
a couple of things. First, a promise is sacred and should be kept if at all
possible, especially a promise made within a family. This is true whether
keeping the promise is convenient or not.
Second, Tamar is an example of someone who refuses to
accept being cast aside by a patriarch just because he thinks he can easily get
away with it. She uses what power she has to confront the injustice. I believe
the writers of scripture are acknowledging that just as Judah does at the end
of the story. These same writers hold her up as a heroine of sorts – a heroine
that deserves to be one of the few women and few gentiles mentioned in the
genealogy of Jesus.
Prayer: God help me to see people the way you do. Call
me out when my judgmental attitudes surface. Amen.
Prayer Focus: Pray for God to show you one place where
you have been wrong about someone. Yes, I know; that’s a dangerous prayer. Pray
it anyway.
Song: Brandon Heath – I’m Not Who I Was
