When Familiarity Doesn’t Breed Contempt -
Matthew 13:53-58, NLT - When Jesus had finished telling these stories
and illustrations, he left that part of the country. He returned to Nazareth, his hometown. When he
taught there in the synagogue, everyone was amazed and said, “Where does he get
this wisdom and the power to do miracles?” Then they scoffed, “He’s just the carpenter’s
son, and we know Mary, his mother, and his brothers—James, Joseph, Simon, and
Judas. All his sisters live right here
among us. Where did he learn all these things?” And they were deeply offended and refused to
believe in him.
Then Jesus told them, “A prophet is honored everywhere
except in his own hometown and among his own family.” And so he did only a few miracles there
because of their unbelief.
It’s been said that “familiarity
breeds contempt.” There have even been scientific
studies to document the truth of this popular saying. One study done by researchers from Harvard,
MIT, and Boston University suggests that generally speaking, we are more able
to like people we don’t know a whole lot about.
As we get to know people more, we begin to notice more differences
between them and ourselves. We realize
we don’t agree on many issues. The initial
likeability begins to fade. So the
researchers suggest. Many of us can
probably remember times when this happened in our own relationships. Someone we thought was awesome at first turns
out to have really annoying habits.
It seems from the story above that
not even Jesus is immune from this phenomenon.
The people he grew up with are offended by him when he returns. He seems
to know so much more and have so much more wisdom than the carpenter’s son they
knew. They seemed impressed at first,
but the mood sours pretty quickly. Their
disbelief becomes so tangible that Jesus does no more miracles or teaching
among them.
It doesn’t have to be this
way. Contrary to the scientific study
mentioned above and the situation in Nazareth, it is possible to get to know
someone well and grow your love for that person at the same time. But anyone who has had a fruitful long-term relationship
will tell you, it’s hard work. It
requires us to let go of our preferences and let people be who they are. It requires
enough maturity to realize that healthy relationships are not primarily about
our preferences and hearing what we want to hear. Humility is needed to accept teaching and
wisdom from someone we thought we an equal.
The people of Nazareth were not the
only ones who refused to put their faith and hope in Jesus. The gospels record multiple occasions when initial
followers “turned away and deserted him.” (John6:66). This is a big problem
because Jesus invites us into an intimate relationship with God, not a cursory acquaintanceship. There are times when God will teach us things
we don’t want to hear and ask us to do things we don’t want to do. There will be times when we don’t “like” God
very much. Like a visitor who has stayed
to long, there will be times when we just wish God would leave us alone or as
least, keep some distance. But the
highest rewards of a relationship with God are for those who make to decision to
engage their relationship with God even when they don’t feel like it, listen
when they rather ignore, and obey when they rather leave.
Hopefully, we all have at least one
person in our lives who we know intimately (including the things about them
that drive us crazy) and still chose to love them anyway and who has made the
same decision to love us anyway. God wants that kind of relationship with us
too.
Question: Think about a time when you were less than
inviting toward God. What was the
cause?
Prayer: God, we aren’t
always very welcoming of you into the details of our lives. We confess the
resistance that seems to well up inside us from time to time. Thank you for loving us faithfully anyway. We want to love you the same way, but we need
your grace to help us. Amen.
Prayer Focus: Pray
for healing in broken relationships that you are aware of today.
Song: Give Me Faith –
Elevation Worship
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